Enneagram Friendship: How to Connect & Nurture Bonds

Enneagram friendships are just as complex, beautiful, and important as Enneagram romantic relationships.

We are prone to forget the pivotal role friends play in our lives easily, yet so many things in life depend on whom we connect and interact with. More than just being there for us when we need them, friends influence our values in countless ways, from our musical preferences to our college decisions and beyond.

So, in this article, we’ll look at how each Enneagram type makes friends, which Enneagram types get along, and what role friendships play in their lives.

How Each Enneagram Type Makes Friends

Let’s explore Enneagram best friend matches, as well as what each Enneagram personality type is looking for in friendship.

Enneagram Type 1 Friendship

Enneagram Type 1 friendships are based on mutual respect and understanding. Moreover, Ones are amazing friends who, like in all other things in life, always strive to do the right thing. Principled, loyal, and honest, Ones see the best in you and are driven to help you improve your life in any way you want.

However, if you do something that isn’t in line with their moral code, they might feel torn between the desire to help you and the desire to punish you righteously. Nevertheless, if you show remorse, they will willingly help you overcome your weaknesses.

Moreover, Ones look for a friend who will share their values, a friend they can trust and rely on, and who understands their ambitions. They also need someone who is intellectually as agile as they are and who is interested in self-improvement.

Therefore, Ones have the highest friendship compatibility with Types Two, Four, Five, Six, and Eight. Twos and Fours help them get more in touch with their emotions, while Fives, Sixes, and Eights inspire them to grow and pursue their ambitions.

Finally, if you want to be friends with Type One, show respect for their idealistic aspirations and avoid criticizing them even when they deserve it. Their inner critic is already hyperactive, and the last thing they need when they make a mistake is for someone to scold them. Instead, show empathy and warmth to them.

For a fun depiction of typical Enneagram 1 traits, you might enjoy exploring our collection of Enneagram 1 memes.

Enneagram Type 2 Friendship

Enneagram Type 2 friendships are characterized by deep empathy. Twos are extroverted, warm, and affectionate, and they make friends easily. Plus, they are highly attuned to other people’s needs, so they find it natural to help and support others.

While they generously lavish their friends with attention and warmth, Twos can become quite resentful if their efforts aren’t recognized and appreciated. In their search for a friend, Twos look for someone who shares their deep emotions and values friendships as much as they do.

Moreover, they are very forgiving as long as you show them how important they are in your life.

In general, Twos can be friends with any Enneagram type, but they build the most fulfilling connections with Ones, Threes, Sixes, Sevens, and Nines. Ones and Threes inspire Twos to be more assertive, Sixes and Nines give them the validation they need, and Sevens bring more joy into their lives.

Furthermore, becoming friends with Twos is easy. And if you really want to build a close relationship with them, never forget to show gratitude for all the things they do for you and show them how much they mean to you.

Enneagram Type 3 Friendship

Enneagram Type 3 friendships are dynamic and exciting. Threes are very competitive, and they often form the strongest friendships with their biggest rivals after overcoming their mutual rivalry. As friends, they offer encouragement and support and are great at inspiring other people to pursue their dreams.

Because their friendships often develop from rivalries or from collaborating on a common objective, Threes expect their friends to possess the same level of ambition and competence that they do. However, they may struggle with vulnerability in friendships, which is why they need a friend who will accept them for who they are regardless of their achievements.

For this reason, Threes’ friendship compatibility is the highest with Nines, Twos, and Sixes, as these types can provide them with the emotional support they crave. However, they also get along well with Type Eight, with whom they share many traits.

If you want to befriend Type Three, show interest in their pursuits and avoid criticizing them. It doesn’t take much for Threes to feel like losers, so help them understand that their achievements do not define them.

Enneagram Type 4 Friendship

Enneagram Type 4 friendships are based on deep, emotional bonds. Fours are compassionate, creative, and honest friends who will never hesitate to share their opinions with you, no matter how different they are from yours.

Moreover, though they may not be the most stable presence in your life, they will always understand you in your darkest and weirdest moments.

In return, Fours need their friends to accept them for who they are without judging them for their whims and moods.

They need someone who is mature and consistent yet deeply emotional and who isn’t afraid of the complexity and intensity of their feelings. Moreover, they need someone with whom they can share their deep insights and who shares their passion for exploring their inner depths.

For this reason, Fours are most likely to make friends with other Fours. However, they also get along great with Twos, Nines, Sixes, and Fives. Twos and Sixes offer them the emotional nourishment they need, while Fives challenge their intellect and creativity.

They also make interesting connections with Type Seven, with whom they share creativity and a thirst for adventure.

Finally, being a friend with Type Four requires deep understanding and a lot of patience for their hypersensitive nature and tendency toward moodiness.

However, they can also be very playful, and they enjoy going to all kinds of social events with their friends. The most important thing to understand about Fours is that they enjoy sharing their feelings.

Enneagram Type 5 Friendship

Enneagram Type 5 friendships are rooted in intellectual compatibility. Though reserved and introverted, Fives are amazing friends once they get close to someone. Consistent, honest, reliable, and excellent problem solvers, Fives are the friends who will stick with you through thick and thin and always offer a practical solution to your problem.

Moreover, Fives are very insightful conversationalists, as they are deep, analytical, and curious thinkers. For this reason, they look for the same level of intellectual agility in their friends. They bond with other people over shared interests and values, so they need a friend with whom they can share their intellectual passions.

Therefore, Fives make great friends with Ones, Eights, Sixes, and Sevens. They are compatible with Ones, Eights, and Sixes intellectually, while Sevens challenge their minds with creativity and innovative ideas.

If you want to be friends with Type Five, you have to be very patient. They are one of the most introverted Enneagram types, and earning their trust is not easy. But, once they learn to trust you, make sure not to intrude on their personal space and subtly show them how much you care through words of affirmation and by spending quality time with them.

Enneagram Type 6 Friendship

Enneagram Type 6 friendships are based on emotional support and understanding. Sixes are the most loyal, caring, and attentive friends anyone can wish for. Friendships mean the world to them, and they will always go out of their way to help a friend in need. However, earning their trust isn’t easy, but it is surely worth the effort.

When a Six feels safe with you, you’ve earned a friend for a lifetime. All they ask for in return is honesty, stability, and emotional support. Deeply sensitive and prone to excessive worrying, Sixes need friends who will validate their feelings, provide emotional care in critical moments, and encourage them to relax and enjoy life more.

Therefore, Sixes have the best friendship compatibility with Types Two, Four, Five, and Nine. Twos, Nines, and Fours soothe Six’s anxieties, and Fives provide them with the stability they crave. Meanwhile, they can also be great friends with Eights, as they can provide them with the guidance and protection that Sixes also need.

If you want to be friends with Sixes, show that you are a responsible, serious, and stable person. Avoid criticizing them, as they are already anxious enough. Be kind and respect the energy they invest in their connection with you.

Want to know your friends' Enneagram types? Try our Type Guesser Friendship test.

Enneagram Type 7 Friendship

Enneagram Type 7 friendships are based on shared interests and a sense of fun and adventure. Sevens are the type of friend you want to take to every party, as they ensure everyone has a good time. Creative, spontaneous, and lively, they are very optimistic and inspire you to see the positive in every situation.

Sevens seek friends who are just as open-minded, spontaneous, and playful as they are. They want people with whom they can embark on adventures and who won’t bore them with mundane issues. Sevens are fascinated with passionate and brave people who can keep up with their fast pace.

For this reason, they get along the best with Eights, Threes, and Fives, as these types are just as independent as they are. They also benefit greatly from friendships with Sixes and Nines, as these types teach Sevens to handle their feelings more efficiently.

Therefore, to be friends with Seven, one must maintain an open mind, be adventurous, and share ideas freely.

Enneagram Type 8 Friendship

Enneagram Type 8 friendship is based on loyalty and respect. Eights are very direct, honest, and reliable friends who never hesitate to share their opinions with you and will fiercely defend you if you ever find yourself wrongly accused or mistreated in any way.

Deeply loyal and devoted, Eights take their friendships very seriously and can even be a bit possessive.

They seek friends who can match their intellectual power and who aren’t intimidated by their intense energy and domineering attitude. Like Type Two, they desire emotional reciprocity, and, at times, their friendships take on a mafia-like quality as they are extremely protective of their friends.

For this reason, they are great friends with Twos, Sixes, and Nines. These types provide them with the emotional support they need. Meanwhile, they also build strong friendships with Sevens based on their shared need for excitement and adventure. Fives are also a good match, thanks to their strong intellectual compatibility.

If you want to be friends with Type Eight, be prepared to go through rigorous tests of your loyalty and devotion. Be firm and respectful, and don’t hesitate to stand up for yourself. Eights have no respect for pushovers.

Enneagram Type 9 Friendship

Enneagram Type 9 friendships are based on empathy. Nines are very similar to Twos in the sense that they can also build close friendships with any Enneagram type as they are deeply attuned to the needs of other people.

Moreover, there’s nothing a Nine can’t understand, and they offer a sense of deep acceptance to all the people they love.

Nines seek harmony and compassion in friendships. Since they are usually the ones providing support, they need people who will make them feel seen and heard, too.

For this reason, they have the highest friendship compatibility with Twos and Sixes, as these types are just as compassionate and sensitive as they are.

They also get along great with Ones who inspire them to take more initiative toward their goals in life. Eights can also be a good match due to the sense of protection they can provide them.

Finally, if you want to be friends with Type Nine, make sure you provide enough room for their feelings and don’t intrude on their need for privacy, as they need their alone time to recharge. Also, bear in mind that conflicts are very stressful for them, and make sure you communicate with them in a very tactful and kind manner.

Interested in Enneagram types as parents? Read our Enneagram Parenting article.

Key Takeaways

It’s important to understand that friendship can develop between any two Enneagram types, as each has something unique to offer.

Moreover, every Enneagram type goes through different life phases, each marked by different priorities, which also significantly influence Enneagram friendships.

Strong friendships can form between any two Enneagram types, just as any two Enneagram types can form a lasting romantic relationship.