Enneagram 2 Friendship: A Friend In Need is a Friend Indeed

15 October 2024

enneagram 2 friendship

Enneagram 2 friendships are characterized by warmth and stability. Twos are amazing friends who make others’ lives more beautiful, fulfilled, and easier because they bring so much love and kindness into every connection. Having them as a friend is a blessing in many ways!

So, in this article, we’ll explore what makes Enneagram Type Two special as a friend, what challenges Enneagram 2 friendships face, and how they can make them even more rewarding.

Let’s dive in!

4 Most Important Traits of Enneagram 2 as Friends

Two girls in matching outfits lying on a patio

Enneagram Type Two, also known as the Helper, is highly attuned to the needs of others and, therefore, easily makes friends even with people with whom they don’t have much in common. This is equally true for both Enneagram Type 2 subtypes2w3 and 2w1.

With that in mind, here are the four most important traits of Enneagram 2 as a friend:

#1. Compassion

Twos are very intuitive and easily understand how other people feel without many words. Just quickly looking into your eyes is enough for them to read what’s going on inside you. You never have to explain yourself and your feelings to them—they simply know and understand.

Moreover, they also know exactly what to say to make you feel better, comfort you, encourage you, and motivate you to rise up again. This makes Type Two a perfect confidante who often seems to understand you better than you understand yourself. In fact, this is the reason why Enneagram 2 friendships are so deep and meaningful.

#2. Generosity

There’s almost nothing an Enneagram Type Two friend wouldn’t do for their friends. You can call them in the middle of the night, and they will readily get up to help you in every way they can.

It doesn’t matter whether you need attention, comfort, understanding, or money—Twos will not question your intentions or make you feel uncomfortable for asking; they will simply help you with whatever you need. For Twos, helping a friend in need is a pleasure, and they feel good about themselves when they have the opportunity to make others’ lives easier.

#3. Loyalty

Relationships are the most important thing in a Helper’s life, and they take their friendships seriously. Loyal, devoted, and committed, Twos make the most reliable friends you can depend on regardless of what you’re going through. Thanks to their unwavering dedication, Enneagram 2 friendships successfully survive the trials and tribulations of time.

#4. Warmth

Twos' emotions are very intense, and when they love someone, they show them affection in many ways. For example, Twos always look forward to seeing you, and a gentle smile on their face will welcome you every time you meet. They will also not hesitate to hug you or to hold your hand as a sign of support.

In general, Twos are excellent at making their friends feel taken care of. They create a safe haven for everyone they love, and people are naturally drawn to their motherly aura.

3 Valuable Strengths of Enneagram 2 as a Friend

The most valuable strengths of Enneagram 2 as a friend come from their genuine desire to support and protect others. Here are the three traits that make Twos stand out as friends:

#1. Intuition

Intuition allows Twos to be there for you just the way you need them to be without asking you to overexplain yourself. They easily pick up your unspoken needs and emotions, sense when something is off, and know how to react to avoid triggering you or making you feel even worse.

Thanks to their intuition, Twos create close bonds with others quickly and easily, as they spontaneously give precisely what others need, making them feel seen, heard, and understood.

#2. Encouragement

Enneagram Type Two is great at motivating others to give their best and persevere in their pursuits. Thanks to their intuitive and compassionate nature, they quickly see what their friends need to hear to feel more confident. As a result, Twos’ friends feel safe, supported, and encouraged around them.

In addition, Twos find genuine pleasure in witnessing their friends’ growth and success and deeply enjoy seeing them empowered.

#3. Nurture

Twos generally have a very refined, motherlike aura and are great at providing care to others. They express their love with words, gestures, small gifts, and acts of kindness, thus making their friends feel important and appreciated.

There’s no better friend than a Type Two to help you go and grow through an emotional heartbreak or any other kind of bereavement.

Challenges of Being Friends With the Helper

A group of friends hugging - enneagram 2 friendship

Challenges of being friends with the Helper can generally be described as a consequence of Twos’ inherent insecurity about their worth. There’s no doubt that Two’s compassionate and generous nature brings immense value to their friendships, but some difficulties are inevitable, such as:

  • Lack of boundaries: Though they genuinely want to help, Twos may be too intrusive, meddling where their help isn’t asked for or needed. Their friends may feel like they have a controlling and anxious parent instead of a real friend in Type Two, which may lead to conflicts. That’s because Twos don’t have a natural sense of personal boundaries and easily overextend themselves.
  • Neediness: While Twos are honest in providing support, love, and care for others, they also hope that others will reciprocate their feelings and show gratitude at some point. When their efforts aren’t recognized, Twos easily feel invalidated and may react by being clingy, needy, and resentful in the end.
  • Conflict avoidance: Helpers tend to see conflict as a threat to a friendship and may be too compliant, thus avoiding addressing and solving any real issue they might have. Conflict avoidance inevitably leads to unspoken problems piling up and may result in strained connections and unnecessary distance.

3 Tips for Building a Strong Friendship with an Enneagram Type 2

A woman showing something on her phone to her friend

Making friends with Enneagram Type Two is easy, but being a good friend to them isn’t so simple. So, if you want your Enneagram 2 friendship to bloom and to be as good of a friend to the Helper as they are to you, here are three essential tips:

#1. Encourage Them to Pursue Their Own Ambitions

Twos find it so natural to focus on others’ needs and easily forget about their own. For this reason, many of their amazing talents don’t see the light of day. Therefore, Twos need friends who will encourage them to pursue their own talents and go after their own dreams.

Though Twos might be resistant at first, don’t give up; give them the support that they so generously gave you, and enjoy witnessing their growth.

#2. Reciprocate Their Feelings

While they may seem like they don’t need anything in return, Twos do need to hear how much they mean to you. They are ready to go above and beyond for their friends as long as they feel recognized and appreciated. If they feel taken for granted, they might become manipulative, resentful, and vindictive and resort to their unhealthy patterns.

So, don’t hesitate to show affection to your Type Two friend. Show them how much you love them and how much they improve your life with kind words, gestures, and in any other way you believe is appropriate.

#3. Encourage Them to Embrace Self-Care

Twos tend to feel guilty when they take time for themselves. It would mean the world to them if their friends encouraged them to care for themselves in the same way they care for others. Explain to your Type Two friends that by embracing self-care and practicing self-love, they will only become better friends because they will have more energy to share with others.

How Can the Helpers Become Better Friends?

A group of friends on a field - enneagram 2 friendship

Helpers can become better friends mainly by working more on their self-respect and self-awareness.

Twos are amazing friends in every way, but they can make their relationships even better by following these essential tips.

Avoid overextending yourself

Your friends know they can rely on you at every moment, so there’s no need to prove to them that you are willing to help. If they haven’t asked you for help directly, don’t insist on helping them. Bear in mind that, sometimes, the best way to help someone is not to help them. So, instead of chronically overextending yourself, help when you are asked and not when you believe you should.

Practice assertive communication

Your friends need to hear what you need from them, which is why you shouldn’t expect others to be as intuitive as you are. Instead of assigning meaning to their gestures and reading between the lines, communicate openly with your friends about your needs and desires.

Establish healthy boundaries

Even your closest friends may easily take your generosity for granted if you don’t learn to establish healthier boundaries. Learning how to refuse demands that you don’t have the emotional or material capacity for is essential to maintaining healthy relationships. Otherwise, you will chronically feel resentful and exploited for no real reason.

Manage your expectations

Not all friends can fulfill all our expectations and needs, and it is essential to communicate what you want your friendship with someone to be. Some people are great at cheering you up, some people are the best to comfort you, and some people will inspire you to be the best version of yourself—everyone can bring a unique quality into your life, but you need to be aware of what you expect from other people to avoid unnecessary disappointment.

Ask for help

Although you are great at providing help to others, you would rather do anything than ask for help when you need it. No matter how beneficial you may think this is for your friendships, the truth is it’s not. This way, you’re sending others the message that you don’t need them, so they don’t even think of you as someone who might need support and help. So, change the narrative and see how good it feels when someone has your back.

Which Enneagram Type Could Be Your BFF?

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Key Takeaways

You can consider yourself fortunate if you have Enneagram Type Two as a friend! No one can match their mind-reading skills and make you feel so loved, protected, and understood!

So, let’s remind ourselves once more what makes Enneagram 2 friendship so special:

  • Enneagram 2 friendships are stable, long-lasting, and full of warmth because Twos invest so much love into them and ensure they never fail their friends’ expectations.
  • If you want to be a good friend to a Type Two, don’t take them for granted—encourage them to pursue their own dreams instead of focusing on others, and show them how much they mean to you.
  • To improve Enneagram 2 friendships, Twos need to practice self-love, learn to establish healthier boundaries, and communicate their needs more assertively.