Enneagram Type 6 Compatibility: Who’s The Best Match?

If only love life could be as elaborately planned as business strategy is, thinks an Enneagram 6, hoping to avoid the inevitable rollercoaster of romance. However, the truth is that nothing can protect a Six from experiencing the arrows of Cupid. And luckily, an Enneagram 6 compatibility analysis can help them create more fulfilling romantic partnerships.

In this guide, we discuss the Enneagram type 6's love language, how they get along with other Enneagram types, as well as their hopes and fears for relationships.

Enneagram Type 6 in Love and Relationships

Enneagram Type 6 seeks security and steadiness in love and relationships. They are loyal, devoted, and attentive partners who need some time to open up, but when they do, they are exceptionally warm and affectionate.

Sixes approach all kinds of connections in their lives seriously, with a desire to build meaningful relationships. These individuals need to feel safe and protected, sothey want a partner who will provide direction and guidance.

They also suffer from a profound fear of abandonment and, therefore, feel an intense need to protect themselves from potential betrayal. This is also the main reason why they move so slowly in romantic relationships.

Just like generally in life, Sixe’s views on love and relationships are very traditional. They value steadiness, commitment, and loyalty above everything else and aren’t the least attracted to adventures and flirting. So, in other words, Loyalists seek harmony and consistency in both their personal and professional lives. For a lighter perspective on these characteristics, you can explore our Enneagram 6 memes compilation.

How Compatible Is Enneagram 6 With Other Types?

Enneagram 6 compatibility with other types largely depends on the level of security the other person can provide them with in a relationship. Before we get to the details of each combination, here’s a brief Enneagram 6 compatibility chart to give you a general picture:

Type 6 and Type 1

Sixes and Ones both have strong perfectionistic tendencies that come from completely different motivations. Ones feel like they have to earn to feel worthy by performing perfectly, while Sixes just want to ensure security in their lives by making everything perfect.

As a result, despite the fact that it may seem at first that they have so much in common, they may experience conflicts due to their contrasting motivations. And since both are hypersensitive to criticism, they might both feel like the other partner doesn’t understand or support them.

On the other hand, both Ones and Sixes share the need for stability and commitment in relationships.

Therefore, if they manage to overcome initial differences and understand each other’s emotional needs, they can build a solid future together. Moreover, both are usually interested in personal and professional growth and can be a great inspiration and support to each other.

Type 6 and Type 2

Sixes and Twos are highly compatible because they are eager to meet each other’s needs. Sixes need the reassurance, warmth, and support that Twos so generously provide, and Twos finally have someone who’s ready to reciprocate their feelings.

The depth of Two’s understanding and acceptance soothes Six’s greatest anxiety, and as the relationship progresses, they begin to feel more optimistic about life in general. Twos appreciate the sense of stability and thoughtfulness Sixes bring to the table, and both partners feel respected in this relationship.

These are the couples that stand as pillars of stability and strength in their community. They have very similar views on life and easily decide to build a family together.

The biggest challenge Sixes and Twos face in their relationships revolves around their mutual tendency to avoid conflicts. Both are very sensitive and highly attuned to meeting the needs of other people, which is why they easily neglect their own needs. Therefore, they need to make a conscious effort to communicate more assertively about their needs.

Type 6 and Type 3

The degree of Enneagram 6 compatibility with Enneagram 3 is highly context-dependent. If they meet at the moment when both have matured and overcome their biggest weaknesses, they have a fair chance of building a strong relationship. Otherwise, Sixes, who just want a safe haven, may feel inadequate and small in the face of Threes’ need for recognition and status.

In a professional sense, Sixes and Threes make great business partners who encourage and inspire each other. However, in intimate relationships, Threes have to invest extra effort to make Sixes feel comfortable and safe with them, and Sixes need to understand Threes’ need for active social engagement.

Moreover, since Threes have far more developed social skills and are often very flirtatious, they may easily trigger Sixes’ deepest insecurities. Things may get especially complicated between them because Sixes won’t spontaneously open up and share what bothers them but will instead manufacture numerous worst-case scenarios.

Type 6 and Type 4

Sixes and Fours have an innate understanding of each other—perhaps too much for them to start a romantic relationship. Both are prone to insecurity and all kinds of anxieties, and the stability they both need is something neither of them can give. Therefore, a friendship or business partnership is far more likely to develop between them than a love relationship. Read more about how these types form and maintain friendships in our Enneagram friendship post.

However, if they are both mature enough and capable of taming their inner demons, Sixes may enjoy the creativity of the Fours, and Fours might learn to appreciate the loyalty of Sixes. They are both introspective, private people and enjoy exchanging their insights. They could be a great support to each other, but only after they both overcome their dependency issues.

Otherwise, Fours’ desire for intensity and emotional expression may overwhelm Sixes, who would get exhausted trying to answer the Fours’ needs while Fours would still feel misunderstood.

Type 6 and Type 5

Enneagram 6 compatibility with Enneagram 5 is based on intellectual exchange. These two have a lot in common and understand each other well. Both are cautious, studious, and responsible, and both value security. Sixes appreciate Five’s honesty and pragmatic spirit, while Fives value Six’s support and loyalty.

However, since both are very prudent and sensitive, it may take some time before the spark between them burns. Furthermore, both have a tendency to overthink, which can stifle romantic development.

In terms of potential issues, Sixes can find Five's desire for independence irritating, and Fives can find Sixes' need for assurance overwhelming. Both Enneagram 5 and 6 partners need to practice expressing their feelings more openly in order to develop the close emotional bonds that are essential to sustaining relationships over the long haul.

With patience and empathy, they can overcome all the obstacles—it all depends on how motivated they are to grow together.

Type 6 and Type 6

Sixes pair well with other Sixes because they share the same values, so it doesn’t take them long to start talking about family, marriage, and building a life together. They are often the couple who foster connections between close and distant family members, keeping the family tradition from diminishing.

Though Sixes are emotionally reserved, they feel very comfortable sharing their feelings with other Sixes because of the strong bond of trust they feel together. They also have similar lifestyles and respect each other deeply, which makes their everyday life peaceful and harmonious.

However, despite all their similarities, they also have to overcome a few bumps on the road to a happy relationship.

The biggest challenge they face revolves around the anxiety Sixes are prone to. It may be hard for them to relieve each other’s worries since both are prone to overthinking and catastrophizing. Learning to calm each other in tense situations rather than making things worse requires time and maturity.

Type 6 and Type 7

Sixes and Sevens are very different in terms of emotional needs and goals in life. Sixes dream about safe haven, cozy cuddles by the fireplace, a white fence, and a golden retriever in the backyard, while Sevens are thirsty for exotic adventures. So, while they may share a few intellectual interests, they find it hard to understand each other.

In an ideal scenario, the prudence and thoughtfulness of Sixes could balance Sevens’ restlessness, and Sevens’ enthusiasm and optimistic outlook could bring more joy into Sixes’ realistic perspective. However, it takes a lot of patience and maturity from both sides for their relationship to develop in such a direction.

It is far more likely these two will not show too much interest in each other romantically, though they could be great friends and business partners. Sevens’ liveliness and flirtatious disposition make Sixes feel deeply insecure, so they don’t jump into relationships with Sevens easily.

Type 6 and Type 8

Sixes and Eights can be a great couple because they understand each other’s core needs deeply, and their different characters are complementary. Sixes love the sense of protection, stability, and power Eights bring to the table, while Eights value Sixes’ loyalty.

Plus, Eights understand the Enneagram 6 love language and can provide them with the sense of security they crave. One reason why these two understand each other so well is because they share the same deep fear of betrayal and, therefore, intuitively focus on building trust in their relationship.

However, while Eights can perfectly meet the Enneagram Type 6 intimacy needs, they may also be too controlling and demanding to sensitive Sixes. Plus, Sixes tend to avoid conflicts, and Eights are very confrontational, which may leave Sixes to suffer in silence. So, it is essential for Sixes to practice assertive communication in this relationship.

Type 6 and Type 9

Both Sixes and Nines seek harmony and stability in their relationships, so they understand each other’s emotional needs well. Together, they make for a healthy, nurturing environment that encourages development. They also have similar lifestyles and easily make arrangements about their daily responsibilities.

Sixes enjoy the calmness and support they get from Nines, while Nines appreciate Sixes’ sense of duty and responsibility. Though Sixes can sometimes get irritated by Nines’ slow and relaxed approach to life matters, and Nines can find Sixes’ obsession with details and planning overwhelming, they actually balance each other perfectly.

The biggest challenge in this relationship is that both partners are highly conflict-avoidant. This may lead to silent distancing, where both suffer but can’t identify the cause of their problems. If they don’t allow unresolved problems to pile up and learn to address issues directly, they can build a beautiful, fruitful relationship together.

Key Takeaways

So, as you can see, the question “who Enneagram 6 should marry” has more than one great answer! The truth is every combination of two Enneagram types can work well in a relationship if they are both open to growing, developing, and compromising.

That said, let’s round off with some key insights about Enneagram 6 compatibility:

• Enneagram 6's most compatible types are Twos, Fives, Sixes, and Nines because they answer the Six’s need for security in a relationship the best.
• Enneagram 6's least compatible types are Sevens and Fours because they easily trigger Six’s anxieties.
• Relationships with Eights, Threes, and Ones are also very promising if Sixes learn to overcome their fear of conflicts and communicate more assertively about their needs.

Looking for insights on the compatibility of different Enneagram types? Read our following posts:

• Type 1 Enneagram Compatibility
• Type 2 Enneagram Compatibility
• Type 3 Enneagram Compatibility
• Type 4 Enneagram Compatibility
• Type 5 Enneagram Compatibility
• Type 7 Enneagram Compatibility
• Type 8 Enneagram Compatibility
• Type 9 Enneagram Compatibility