26 January 2024
Enneagram 3 and 7 relationship is based on passion and high compatibility, but that doesn’t mean that Threes and Sevens can’t quickly end up being a horrendous match. Imagine meeting a couple where one person is absolutely obsessed with success, and the other wants to have fun at all times, constantly chasing new highs.
Still, they share intense energy and optimism that can enrich any exchange.
So, in this article, we’ll guide you through the character and core values of these two types, and you’ll see how they fit together.
Enneagram Threes and Sevens can make a highly compatible couple, as they complement each other and have many similar traits. However, they can also be the worst possible combination due to their many differences. Which of these two scenarios will happen largely depends on how mature the Three and Seven in question are.
Generally, the mutual characteristics of these types include exceptionally high energies and assertiveness from both sides. They’re fun-loving people who radiate optimism.
That extends to them seeming attractive to others because they seem persuasive and very articulate.
Sevens’ creativity makes Three’s ambition spark, and Threes’ understanding makes Sevens go after their passions. The glue that connects them is precisely that—passion. Still, the Enneagram 3 and 7 compatibility can also be tainted by it, because not all passions are positive. Their energy is mostly driven by passion, and when they disagree, the argument can get pretty heated. For a broader perspective on personality frameworks, you might find the comparison of Enneagram vs DISC insightful.
On the flip side, if anything breaks the bond between them, it is the stress that comes from their lack of ability to deal with more profound aspects of their relationship.
As any relationship is a two-way street, both sides must bring something to improve it. When it comes to Type Three, they carry sensitive input and support for their partner. That goes for both Enneagram 3 and 7 friendships.
Unlike Threes, who are excessively failure-conscious, Sevens have no problem with it. They’re spontaneous, somewhat resilient, and always fill the room with joy. Therefore, they bring an enthusiastic wave that eases the Threes.
When Sevens feel appreciated and protected, they tend to devote more time and consistency to their partner, although their nature usually tells them to chase after novelty.
Finally, their energy and charisma match, and that’s another ground the Enneagram 3 and 7 relationship would stand on. As for the rest, Threes’ caring nature may help Sevens overcome their fear of commitment, while reassurance from Sevens’ side can help Threes deal with their fear of failure and the desire to please others.
The relationship between these two types is incredibly complex, as it’s not based just on one aspect. What follows are the primary points that will show in what way they click and in what way they don’t. You’ll have a chance to see how they behave on their own and as a duo.
Communication is Type Three’s forte. They know what and when to say something to win people over. After all, being liked is one of their greatest goals.
Similarly, Sevens take the communication lead, too. They’re dominant and assertive when they have an audience.
An Enneagram 7 male often exhibits this assertive communication style, thriving in social settings where his charisma and energy can shine.
But due to their shared dominance, head butts may occur if they disagree on a topic. If they’re both on the same page, all should be well.
Type Three, otherwise known as the Achiever, will do anything to get to their goal, even if it means manipulating others. They strive for perfection, whatever the profession is. As a result, they seek external recognition and strongly focus on their image in the eyes of others.
Conversely, although often successful themselves, Sevens usually cherish pleasure, optimism, and energy above anything else. They advocate living in the now and don’t waste a moment.
Certain things can boost trust between these two types, and they have everything to do with transparency and interaction.
As we already know, Sevens are very much into exploring and adventures. Mutual trust and understanding enrich their relationship if Sevens are open to Threes about their quests.
Conversely, Sevens value when Threes are flexible and can partake in activities at the last moment. In fact, Sevens consider this a sign of appreciation and are more likely to confide in them because of it.
There are many reasons why Sevens could be stressed, but the leading causes are someone micro-managing them or keeping them stuck in one place. Then, they tend to resort to escapism and finding hedonistic pleasures to feel alive again.
Threes, on the other hand, get stressed by their worst nightmare—failure. They can become listless and passive if they don’t achieve a goal.
It can get tricky if they’re stressed together because Enneagram Threes in stress can be frustrated with Sevens’ attempt to ease their pain with additional pleasure, and Sevens can be annoyed by Threes' lethargy.
The core of the Enneagram 3 and 7 relationship is grounded in passion. This is a shared similarity with Fours and Sevens, which also have very strong chemistry.
Threes see sex as a means of proving they’re desirable. So, as long as Sevens adore them, Threes will affirm their self-worth. Sevens should give compliments and show that they’re in awe of their beauty.
Sevens see passion and intimacy as their playground on which enjoyment is the only goal. To them, sex and intimacy are a time when you should flip a switch on thinking and explore your senses. They appreciate playfulness, so Threes should tease and experiment, especially when Enneagram 3 and 7 types are in love.
When there’s a spark between two people who are types Three and Seven, they do their best to share life, love, joy, and pain.
When the masks come off, they try to deal with their trauma, fear of negative exposure, and vulnerability together. That’s the primary benefit of their Enneagram compatibility—unveiling masks.
Threes can support Sevens in their often obsessive fear of social confinement, while Seven can be there for Three to tell them that it’s okay to fail sometimes.
As some of the dynamics of these two Enneagram types correlate, this couple can spend hours discussing politics, philosophy, and science.
They’re driven and often very well-informed, so they enjoy discussing broad topics. On the one hand, they admire themselves. On the other, they want the insights they get from one another.
While both cherish nuance and complexity, type Three is interested in learning and dealing with challenging theories or tasks. Hence, their intellectual compatibility is at a very high level, similar to the one of Eights and Nines.
If we imagine Enneagram 3 and 7 dating, it’s safe to assume they’ve already discovered each other’s strengths and weak points.
With that, Sevens’ enthusiasm and ‘glass half-full’ attitude can motivate Threes to get up, even when they fail.
The same goes the other way around. If Seven finds themselves in a situation where their options for pleasure and adventures are narrowed, Three can also show care and encouragement, which is one of the core traits of this personality type.
All in all, when things are great, these two can be a match made in heaven.
Like any Enneagram pair, type Three and type Seven can face significant pitfalls due to differences in some aspects of their characters. Here are some of the most common potential problems with the Enneagram 3 and 7 relationship.
While Sevens put their primary focus on enjoying each day and having fun, Threes may find that puzzling because they can’t process how someone can be so irresponsible.
The possible solution to this problem may lie in a compromise. Even though Threes are highly goal-oriented, they may try to meet Sevens halfway and see things from their perspective.
Additionally, there could be too much ‘electricity’ under one roof. They’re passionate and energetic, which can sometimes be overbearing for everyone. Moreover, both are usually workaholics, which may affect family life—a trait that is similarly evident in the Enneagram Type 3 & 3 relationship.
On a lighter note, Threes may occasionally be jealous of Sevens' carefree lifestyle, especially if they have an excellent career without trying much.
The best way to go about these problems is to be honest, no matter how hard it may be. It could lead to a fruitful conversation once they cross that initial bridge.
Another thing is setting priorities straight. If their families suffer the consequences of their workaholic lifestyles, maybe they should check what’s essential and what comes next.
Enneagram types may show characteristics of other types adjacent to them from the left and right sides. We call these types Enneagram wings. Threes have Two and Four wings, while Sevens have Eight and Six.
7w8 tends to be focused, persistent, ambitious, and pragmatic. Such traits may impress Threes, as ambition and focus are practically their core values.
Additionally, 7w6 is more tactful and empathetic, which boosts 3 and 7’s relationship immensely.
On the other hand, if you’re a 3w2 personality type, you’ll match well with Sevens due to your charm and focus on people.
This wing helps Threes regulate emotions better, helping them understand the needs of others, including Sevens’. That may be an excellent addition to a more successful relationship.
3w4 may be the most vital refreshment, as it tones down Threes’ obsession with success. Sevens may appreciate this because they often find their drive overwhelming.
Communication, understanding, and balance. Improving relationships doesn’t only imply solving problems. Even when everything seems to be going great in their relationship, Threes, and Sevens could go the extra mile and improve it to perfection.
One of the go-to strategies is to communicate appropriately. Regular conversations about the needs of both parties may help them understand the partner’s desires they previously didn’t even notice. That involves a lot of active listening and patience.
With true understanding and an insight into what the other side is made of, they could put each other’s mistakes into more perspective.
Additionally, for these two types, balance is of the essence. They may find lowering their energy levels beneficial and work on being a little more still.
After this article, we hope you can imagine the dynamic and vibrant relationship that may form when Enneagram Types 3 and 7 relationships.
For more insights on Enneagram 3 relationships, check out these articles:
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