Unveiling The Intensity of the Enneagram 8 and 8 Relationship

The Enneagram 8 and 8 relationship is a cosmic meeting of two energies so intense that even gravity could hardly get in their way. Together, they often appear like a couple of bulls in a china shop, like every move they make could cause an apocalypse.

Nevertheless, they are more prone to questioning social norms than shattering porcelain cups—though dramatic scenes are also on the table.

If their relationship were a movie, it would be an 18ᐩ steamy action and romance movie full of unexpected twists and turns.

So buckle up tightly as we’re embarking on a journey to explore the explosive connection of two Eights!

Enneagram Type 8 and 8 Compatibility

Eights are the most self-confident Enneagram personality type, and they know exactly what they want. So, if they like someone, they will not beat around the bush but be very straightforward about their intentions.

However, though they are attracted to each other by the traits they share, these same traits could cause major challenges in their relationship. Just as they are quick to start a relationship with each other, they are as quick to start a fight. And, since both are assertive and outspoken, their discussions easily get quite heated.

In general, it is safe to say that Enneagram 8 and 8 compatibility is high because they intuitively understand each other’s core needs, vulnerabilities, and fears.

Nevertheless, the level of their compatibility significantly depends on their level of maturity. The more they are aware of their strengths and weaknesses, the better the chances are for a harmonious relationship between them.

How Enneagram Type 8 and 8 Contribute to the Relationship

There’s an abundance of passion in an Enneagram 8 and 8 relationship. Both partners are delighted that they have finally found someone who is not afraid of the intensity of their emotions.

They are both dynamic, energetic, and assertive, so their relationship is exceptionally exciting. Given their adventurous spirit, typical Enneagram 8 hobbies, such as extreme sports and outdoor competitions, often enhance their bond.

There’s also a lot of respect between them, as they intuitively feel each other’s strength of character.

Furthermore, they take pleasure in discussing a wide range of topics and what they consider a discussion other people would likely perceive as conflict. But for Eights, these are simply lively debates over viewpoints, and they are relieved that they do not have to tiptoe around each other.

However, while they are both very direct in expressing their opinions, communicating how they feel can be tricky for them. That’s because both are afraid of exposing their vulnerability despite the fact that they understand each other so well.

Enneagram Type 8 and 8 Relationship: Full Details & Insights

It might seem like everything is clear and simple between two Enneagram Type 8s in a relationship. However, there’s nothing simple about the connection between these two intense personality types.

So, let’s analyze their relationship and delve into the key factors that bring them together.

#1. Type 8 and Type 8—Communication

Eights have a direct, honest, and assertive communication style. They can also be very charming, seductive, and persuasive when they find it necessary. So, while, in general, they appreciate each other’s directness, there’s no guarantee they won’t step on each other’s toes by being too blunt.

Moreover, while they can easily solve all kinds of problems together, they may find it hard to express how they feel about each other. It all depends on how mature they are and whether they have overcome the tendency to interpret gentle feelings as weakness.

#2. Type 8 and Type 8—Values

Eights value power, integrity, honesty, and loyalty. They also have a strong sense of right and wrong and are respectful of those who share their values. Therefore, they bond easily over their shared values and hold deep respect for one another. Similarly, in relationships between Fives and Sixes, they bond over a shared value of security and knowledge, where they accommodate each other to find stability.

In terms of relationship values, they also easily find a common language since both appreciate passion, devotion, and stability.

#3. Type 8 and Type 8—Building Trust

Eights often have severe trust issues, and a lot of their life strategy is based on their inability to rely on anyone but themselves. Therefore, though they understand each other well and share so many values, building trust between them is a long and complicated process.

They will test each other’s loyalty in many different ways, and even when they get reassured they can trust each other, they will find it hard to let their guard down completely.

However, once they finally do, they develop a deep sense of ease in each other's presence and create a strong bond.

#4. Type 8 and Type 8—Stress Management

Though Eights under stress can be very explosive and confrontational, when they are together, they understand each other’s triggers and offer each other quiet understanding. When paired with a more calm type, like in an Eight and Nine relationship, for example, Eights can easily become aggressors.

Paradoxically, two Eights as two ticking bombs relax each other because they feel they finally have someone who can match their strength by their side.

However, given their highly volatile nature, it is important to exercise caution when both are experiencing stress. This is because they tend to redirect their anger towards others, creating a breeding ground for potential conflicts.

#5. Type 8 and Type 8—Passion & Intimacy

Eights are very physical and sensual individuals with a prominent hedonistic streak. So, when two Eights get together, fireworks are on the way! They both enjoy the fact that they have found someone who shares their big appetite for life’s pleasures.

So, lack of passion is never an issue in the Enneagram 8 and 8 relationship. Moreover, the Enneagram 8 and 8 dating stage is particularly exciting and full of electricity as they recognize each other’s potential for passion.

#6. Type 8 and Type 8—Emotional Support

Eights deeply respect each other, and though they may refuse to talk openly about their vulnerabilities, they will have each other’s backs in tough times.

In addition, if at least one of them is a highly developed, mature Enneagram Type 8, there’s a great chance they will establish an open, supportive, and emotionally close connection.

#7. Type 8 and Type 8—Intellectual Exchange

Eights have a strong intellect and enjoy debates. They are never afraid to speak up and express a different opinion, but they also hate not being right. Therefore, two Eights are sure to engage in many heated discussions.

Both bring plenty of determination, assertiveness, eloquence, and hunger for knowledge to the table, so they are pretty stimulative for each other. Though there may seem to be plenty of debate in their relationships, they benefit from having someone who is not afraid of open confrontation.

#8. Type 8 and Type 8—Mutual Motivation & Encouragement

Understanding each other's aspirations and providing complete support is easy for Eights because they both desire to be in positions of power while preserving their independence. For this reason, they often grow to become a real power couple with a lot of influence in the community.

Nevertheless, there is always the chance that they might become overly competitive, particularly when they are both feeling overwhelmed, a trait also seen in the Enneagram 3 and 3 relationship.

3 Potential Troubles in Enneagram Type 8 and 8 Relationship

Many things can go wrong in an Enneagram 8 and 8 relationship. It is not their differences that hinder harmony for them, but rather the very things they share. Here’s a brief overview of the potential troubles they typically face as a couple:

Power Struggles

Eights are natural leaders, and it is not easy for them not to be in charge. So, since both want to be in control and both are very decisive and bossy, power struggles between them are inevitable. Plus, both are extremely stubborn and competitive, so it is necessary for them to learn to compromise.

It is essential that they set relationship goals so that they can channel their energy into working toward the same goal instead of competing with one another.

Difficulty with Emotional Expression

Depending on their emotional maturity level, Eights are more or less averse to displaying vulnerability. Even though two Eights in a relationship understand each other well and intuitively feel each other’s weak spots, the fear that they might be betrayed never leaves them completely.

It is important for both of them to focus on embracing their fears and understanding their vulnerabilities.

Jealousy and Possessiveness

Enneagram 8 and 8 in love can be very possessive while also insisting on their independence. Eights have a strong aversion to feeling restricted or controlled by others. Just like two fives, they are fiercely protective of their independence.

However, when it comes to love, they desire complete devotion from their partner. This dynamic can be observed in the Enneagram 8 child as well, who often exhibits early signs of wanting both independence and unwavering loyalty from those close to them.

It goes without saying that they both anticipate a high level of commitment from one another, even though they are well aware of each other's desire for independence.

They have to find a way to balance their need for independence with their need for commitment. Otherwise, they will consistently test each other’s loyalty and suffer from jealousy and possessiveness.

How Enneagram Type 8 Wings Impact Their Relationship

The Enneagram test may show that your Enneagram type has wings. This means that you have some traits of one of the two types adjacent to your core type on either side of the Enneagram circumference. Enneagram wings subtly shape your core type, adding more nuance and versatility to it.

So, an Eight can have Types Seven and Nine as their wings. Though overlapping wings often increase compatibility between two types, that’s not the case with two 8s who have 7 as a wing.

8w7 is a highly independent adventurist who finds it extremely hard to settle down and commit to their partner. So, two 8w7s are most likely to have a brief, intense romance but aren’t likely to last together. Therefore, it makes more sense for 8w7 to find balance with 8w9, which is a much calmer and more compassionate version of Type 8.

How Can Type 8 and 8 Take Their Relationship to the Next Level

Building a strong foundation for both Enneagram 8 and 8 friendships and romantic relationships requires significant effort to navigate the challenges that arise from their shared traits. Here are some helpful tips for fostering harmonious relationships between the two Eights.

Create a Safe Space for Vulnerability

One advantage of being in a relationship with someone who shares the same personality type is that such a relationship amplifies all the typical weaknesses of that type. This, in turn, forces both individuals to work on overcoming these weaknesses.

For this to happen, it is essential that they communicate openly about their feelings. They need to create a safe space for each other so that they both feel comfortable expressing their vulnerabilities without fear of judgment.

Replace Competitiveness and Criticism with Empathy

Setting common goals based on shared values enhances empathy between the two Eights and paves the way for mutual understanding. The better they understand each other and the more compassionate they are, the less they will feel the need to compete and criticize one another.

Practicing empathy will also allow them to understand that compromise isn’t a sign of weakness but an important aspect of every healthy and mature relationship.

Key Takeaways

Two Eights together will either grow and mature to build a great relationship or engage in endless power struggles until they break up.

But, to round up on a positive note, let’s focus on what happens when two Eights decide to grow together:

• Because of their shared values, two Eights can become a true power couple.
• Both are happy to have finally found someone who can match their intensity, passion, and energy and who isn’t afraid to stand up to them.
• They find the strength to overcome their weaknesses together and often become each other's biggest source of inspiration and encouragement.

Explore the dynamics of Type 8 relationships with other Enneagram types in our articles:

• Enneagram 6 and 8 relationship
• Enneagram 7 and 8 relationship