5 December 2024
The debate between the Golden Rule vs. Platinum Rule is ever relevant, as both rules have their advantages and disadvantages and can be interpreted in many ways. Exploring how they relate to the Enneagram types gives us new perspectives for understanding the diversity and depth of the Enneagram theory and the multifaceted nature of the said rules.
In this article, we’ll delve into the philosophy of the Platinum Rule vs. Golden Rule and explore how each Enneagram type relates to them. We’ll also analyze how these rules affect your Enneagram and relationships with others in general.
Let’s dive in!
The Golden Rule is a universal ethical principle that proposes we should treat others how we would like to be treated. The origins of the Golden Rule can be traced to many cultures and religions, from Christianity and Judaism to Hinduism and Buddhism.
Moreover, there’s a strong connection between the Golden Rule and the Bible, though the Golden Rule, as such, doesn’t appear in the Bible.
However, despite the fact that it sounds perfectly altruistic at first sight, the Golden Rule relies on the premise that we treat ourselves with respect, love, and understanding. This is problematic in multiple ways, as many of us lack self-respect, struggle with self-love, and are still learning to understand ourselves.
So, if an individual doesn’t treat themself well, would the Golden Rule imply they also shouldn’t treat others well?
Of course not, but that’s the trap with overly simplified ethical principles like this rule; they sound so universal and easy to follow, yet they can be challenging in real life.
The Platinum Rule says that instead of treating others the way we would like to be treated, we should treat them the way they want to be treated. So, the Platinum Rule can be interpreted as an upgraded version of the Golden Rule that promotes more flexibility in practicing empathy.
Moreover, this rule takes into account that every individual is unique and has a different set of values that may not apply to others. Therefore, treating someone the way we treat ourselves may not at all be an act of kindness.
While it builds on the Golden Rule and owes its origins to it, the Platinum Rule was formulated through the work of Dr. Tony Alessandra, an author and motivational speaker specializing in communication and relationships.
He provided many interpretations of the Platinum Rule to support building deeper connections and mutual respect between people in different contexts.
Essentially, the Platinum Rule invites people to respect others’ preferences and mutual differences. For example, instead of assuming that everyone likes to hug and insisting on physical contact, you would ask other people if they want to be hugged before taking action.
Let’s have a look at some of the crucial differences between the Platinum and Golden Rule:
Platinum Rule | Golden Rule |
Focuses on understanding others’ needs | Focuses on one’s own inner value system |
Fosters flexibility and open-mindedness | Fosters uniformity and egalitarian approach |
Requires developing empathy | Doesn’t require developing empathy, as it appeals to universally shared needs |
Builds rapport and fosters authentic connection | Builds predictable, easy-to-follow transactions |
Encourages cross-cultural communication | Encourages everyday, basic transactions |
While the key difference between the Platinum Rule vs. Golden Rule is in their focus, there are still many nuances to understand about their application. As both rules are quite complex, there are more than the above-mentioned differences you should learn about to fully understand how they work.
The Golden Rule focuses on individual preferences and, based on the assumption that we all want the same, encourages treating others the way we treat ourselves. The Platinum Rule shifts the focus from our own preferences to the needs of others, encouraging mutual understanding and recognition of differences.
Though in contemporary contexts, the Platinum Rule definitely seems to be more applicable and practical, the Golden Rule still holds its relevance. Nevertheless, both rules have their shortcomings.
To that point, the Golden Rule can be interpreted as encouraging egocentrism and promoting the idea that we should project our own needs and preferences on others. It disregards the fact that not everyone wants or needs to be treated the way you treat yourself.
On top of it, it fails to recognize that the way you treat yourself may not even be in your best interest.
The Platinum Rule, on the other hand, can be criticized for encouraging people-pleasing behavior. Plus, sometimes, the way others want to be treated may not be in their best interest at all.
Analyzing the Platinum Rule vs. Golden Rule in the context of Enneagram provides insight into each type’s preference for internal or external validation systems. With that in mind, let’s see how each personality type relates to these two rules.
Type One takes pride in its strong sense of personal ethics and, therefore, doesn’t perceive the Golden Rule as problematic in any way. They genuinely believe that their focus on justice and high moral standards can be implemented and beneficial to everyone around them.
Thanks to their strong conviction of their own correctness, they are not particularly motivated to understand others’ points of view, which can obviously lead to friction in their relationships as others’ views of what’s right may differ from theirs.
So, implementing the Platinum Rule and learning to focus on what’s correct for others are the directions in which Ones need to grow to improve their relationships.
Twos are entirely focused on others’ needs, and the Platinum Rule corresponds perfectly with their values—they are probably the ones who invented it in the first place. Their ability to attune to others’ needs is very refined, and they are champions of caretaking and empathy.
Nevertheless, Twos often forget their own needs and preferences while tending to others, which is why taking a step back and exploring the Golden Rule may be beneficial to them.
The success-centered and image-conscious Type Three is preoccupied with their own needs and others’ perception of them, so naturally, they see no need to go beyond the Golden Rule. They assume that everyone is just as eager to win the game of life and show off their success, and they don’t question others’ motivations or needs too much.
This is precisely why they would benefit from practicing the Platinum Rule and learning to understand others better.
Though compassionate and introspective, Fours are often self-centered and predominantly focused on their own needs and principles. For this reason, they are prone to believing that their values apply to everyone and that everyone would benefit from aligning more with their principles. Needless to say, they naturally gravitate toward the Golden Rule.
Nevertheless, since they are also very empathetic and sensitive, they often swing between the Golden and Platinum rules, reaching many interesting insights along the way.
Though at first thought it may seem natural for Enneagram Type Fives to adhere to the Golden Rule, they are actually great ambassadors of the Platinum Rule. That’s because they understand the importance and value of personal boundaries and respect different perspectives.
As a result, they are thoughtful, considerate, and tactful in their interactions with others, honoring their preferences while also protecting their own autonomy.
Sixes can be ambivalent when it comes to their perspective of the Platinum Rule vs. Golden Rule. On the one hand, they insist on certain rules and principles that align with their values, and on the other, they are highly attuned to others’ needs and gladly provide their support to everyone.
So, on an everyday level, it makes sense to expect that Sixes may insist on certain aspects of the Golden Rule while they align more with the Platinum Rule in their personal relationships.
The carefree, playful Seven doesn’t actually bother to stick to any kind of principles; they act spontaneously, following their feelings and intuitions.
Therefore, their reactions may be unpredictable in the sense that sometimes they will perfectly embody the Golden Rule, behaving as though everyone’s needs are the same as their own. Other times, they may be the shining example of the Platinum rule, intuitively adapting to others’ preferences.
With that being said, considering their inclination toward self-centeredness, they might be slightly more in favor of the Golden Rule.
Similarly to Ones, Eights also tend to believe that what is best for them is the best for others and are known for projecting their high standards and expectations on everyone.
Independent, direct, and self-assured, they want everyone around them to be just as strong as they are. Moreover, they are likely to perceive people who don’t share their values as weak.
Thus, it’s clear that they are fans of the Golden Rule. However, practicing the Platinum Rule would allow them to have more fulfilling relationships and be more efficient in communication generally.
Enneagram Type Nine is, just like Type Two, a champion of the Platinum Rule. Nines are highly attuned to the needs of others and take great care to protect and preserve harmony in their environment. Focusing on understanding others without imposing one’s own values on them feels perfectly natural to Peacemakers.
In addition, Nine’s challenge lies in learning to balance their own needs with others’ needs, as they are prone to losing their voice while taking care of others. So, focusing on the Golden Rule for a while may help them strike a fine balance between both rules.
Yes, you can combine the Platinum and the Golden Rule. Moreover, it is highly desirable to combine them, as the balance between the two is a great way to foster both empathy and self-awareness.
The Golden Rule can help you stay true to your sense of ethics and personal values, while the Platinum Rule encourages you to understand those of others. Therefore, by integrating both rules into your value system, you reinforce self-respect while also showing respect for others.
The key to successfully implementing both rules into everyday life is understanding that you don’t need to compromise your own values for the sake of others, nor do you have to disregard others’ needs to stay true to your own.
There’s actually no real competition between Platinum Rule vs. Golden Rule and both can be useful in different contexts.
Take our free Enneagram test to determine your Enneagram type and learn how to make the best of your life by combining your strengths and talents and overcoming your weaknesses.
The Enneagram provides you with a detailed roadmap for personal growth and encourages you to pursue your dreams, improve your relationships, and make choices that are in your best interest!
While it is tempting to compare the ‘Platinum Rule vs. Golden Rule,’ it is far more important to understand the origins and meanings of both as one builds upon the other.
When put in the context of the Enneagram test and theory, both rules prove to be equally useful and important, highlighting the need for a balance between empathy and self-awareness.
So, we hope this article encourages you to examine your own personal value system and where you stand regarding the Platinum Rule vs. Golden Rule dichotomy.
The Titanium Rule proposes treating others the way they need to be treated. This rule highlights proactive care and a kind of parental approach that focuses on anticipating others’ needs.
The Golden Rule relates to the Enneagram by highlighting the importance of self-awareness, and The Platinum Rule focuses on the relevance of understanding others, while the Enneagram promotes both self-awareness and mutual understanding.
Ones, Threes, Sevens, and Eights resonate the most with the Golden Rule due to their focus on their own value systems, standards, and needs. These types genuinely believe that what’s best for them is best for others, too.
You can use the Platinum Rule to improve communication with other Enneagram types by exploring their motivations, needs, and desires, showing respect for their differences, and tailoring your behavior accordingly.
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