How to Seduce Each Enneagram Type: Practical Tips

Enneagram theory can teach you how to seduce each type—or at least support the endeavor—by offering deep insights into their motivations and desires. Paving the path to your partner’s heart doesn’t have to be a bumpy maze full of confusion—it can be a wonderful dance of two hearts approaching each other with curiosity, enthusiasm, and affection.

So, to ensure your love pursuits bring you nothing but joy, we’ll share the key insights on how to seduce each Enneagram type based on their romantic preferences and needs.

Let’s dive in!

What is the Enneagram and How Does It Work?

Enneagram is a personality theory that classifies people into nine personality types. Each type is distinguished by its core motivations, fears, strengths, weaknesses, and desires. Unlike many other personality theories, Enneagram doesn’t focus on observable behaviors but on the inner psychological forces that shape each personality type.

As for its origins, the modern Enneagram as we know it today is credited to Oscar Ichazo, a Bolivian philosopher, and his later followers who developed the theory further. In general, the Enneagram is the result of efforts from multiple contributors, and it blends influences from ancient wisdom with modern psychology and philosophy.

Some of the key concepts of Enneagram include Enneagram wings, which explain how Enneagram subtypes are formed, and Enneagram motivations, which describe what drives each type’s behavior.

By taking an Enneagram test and determining your Enneagram type, you gain a deep insight into all the crucial aspects of your personality. Moreover, the Enneagram is an excellent tool for self-exploration and personal growth.

Now, let’s discover how to impress each Enneagram type!

How to Seduce Each Enneagram Type: Tricks That Really Work

By analyzing how to seduce each Enneagram type, you can learn to understand each type’s romantic needs better. Not to mention the practical benefits of tailoring your approach to win over your potential partner.

So, let’s explore Enneagram seduction styles and what Enneagram types in relationships need:

Enneagram 1: Classy Date With a Perfect Twist

The principled, high-minded Ones look for someone who shares their values. They take relationships seriously and seek someone with the integrity and strength of character to match theirs. However, despite being very intentional and precise about their relationship needs, Ones are often drawn to their complete opposites, like Type Seven, for instance.

So, if you want to seduce Type One, being honest and principled is a must. However, don’t be fooled into thinking you have to be perfect. Although Ones have high standards, they subconsciously crave someone to help them relax and bring more fun and joy into their lives.

So, one way to swoon Type One is to plan a perfect date with an unexpected twist. Let it start classy with an elegant dinner and quality music to win their trust. Then spice it up with some low-key fun—take them to a fun amusement park or similar place where they can release their inner child.

If this doesn’t work for you, you can also woo Type One simply by being honest. You can write them a letter in which you describe the effect they had on you and what you admire about them. This will soothe their inner critic and show them that you care about their values.

Enneagram 2: Small Gestures Go a Long Way

Reciprocity is the key to Twos’ heart. These generous, kind souls crave meaningful connection, warmth, and protection. Their ultimate desire is for someone to finally take care of them the way they always take care of everyone else.

However, if you show too much affection too soon, you might scare these delicate types. Twos are often drawn to partners they have to chase, so when someone doesn’t play games with them, they feel confused. Therefore, if you want to win a Type Two, play hard to get for a little bit, but make sure you don’t overdo it. Tact and balance are essential.

In fact, the key is to let Twos believe they managed to catch you. Then, you can shower them with affection and surprise them with thoughtful gifts. Showing honest interest in their needs and feelings will sweep them off their feet.

Also, bear in mind that Twos are very sensual. So, a gentle touch of their hand, a hug, a kiss on the forehead, and similar physical expressions of affection can go a long way in winning Twos’ hearts.

Enneagram 3: Shine but Don’t Outshine Them

Finding a way to Enneagram Type Three’s heart is tricky, as even Threes don’t know how to get there! The truth is that Threes tend to ignore their authentic needs and rather focus on who would match their public image well than on who they are really attracted to.

So, you need to be one step ahead of them. Apart from accepting the part you need to play to complement their social image, you also need to understand them better than they understand themselves.

Nevertheless, in the initial phases of seduction, you need to be playful and alluring. Dress to impress, be the most desirable person in the room, and Threes will naturally come to you. Once you fire up their libido, you can move on to more delicate ways of winning their hearts.

So, the second phase of seducing Threes should be directed toward building a deeper emotional connection. Therefore, engage in eye contact, listen to them carefully, and match their energy. Threes open up more easily to those who they recognize as similar to them.

Enneagram 4: Get Ready for Deep Diving

Fours are very intuitive, and they don’t easily fall for tricks. They are romantics who believe in soulmates and react to others’ energy, not their actions. So, there’s no other way to win their heart but to be yourself.

Nevertheless, there are a few wise moves you can make to facilitate the connection. For example, you can write an essay or a poem, draw a painting, or make some other work of art that feels the most natural to you and invite Fours to share their opinion on it. This will instantly draw Fours’ attention, and they will be intrigued and want to get to know you better.

If you don’t see yourself as an artist, you can also impress Fours by skipping the small talk and going directly to essential philosophical issues. Fours love deep conversations and can’t wait for someone with whom they can share their insights, so make sure you ask meaningful questions and show interest in their world.

Enneagram 5: Tickle Their Curiosity

Fives connect with others through shared interests and values, and they prioritize intellectual compatibility. Intense emotions scare them, so if they feel strongly attracted to you, be ready to chase them because their instinctive reaction is to withdraw to avoid being overwhelmed with emotions.

However, you don’t truly have to chase them—you just need to be very tactful and persistent. Don’t run to show them how you feel; instead, focus on your mutual intellectual interests and always respect their autonomy and need for personal space.

So, if you want to spark the flame between you and Type Five, online communication may be a great idea to start with. Send them a message asking them for opinions on certain topics and engage in discussion with them. If there’s something a Type Five can’t resist, it’s a smart intellectual debate.

When you connect with them on an intellectual level, all the doors are open to you. Your second move should be focused on building trust. Show that you are consistent, responsible, and reliable by sharing how committed you are to your own intellectual pursuits.

Enneagram 6: Make Them Feel Safe

Relationships are very important for Sixes, and they approach them carefully, seriously, and responsibly. Prone to anxiety and worry, Sixes need someone who has a calming effect on their nervous system—someone who can make them feel protected and taken care of.

In terms of seduction, this means that you should focus on building trust and emotional connection. It is important you avoid any kind of surprises, even the pleasant ones, as Sixes don’t react well to unpredictability.

So, to seduce Sixes, play it safe. Plan a perfect date to promote closeness, and show them that you also have a plan B in case something goes wrong. Let them know that their needs are important to you through thoughtful acts of service, like picking their favorite restaurant for the date.

Since Sixes have trouble relaxing, another good way to win their heart could be to invite them for dinner at home and plan fun, intellectually stimulating activities to play together after dinner. Sixes love homey, warm atmospheres, and strategic games are both entertaining and amusing for them.

Enneagram 7: Give them Wings and Let Them Fly

Sevens are playful, extroverted, unpredictable, and adventurous. In other words, good luck catching this social butterfly! You’ll need lots of patience and persistence coupled with a sense of adventure and passion to impress them.

The proven way to draw a Seven’s attention is a good sense of humor. So, be your most playful self, share witty banters, and flirt with them with all the tricks you have up your sleeve. They crave intellectual challenge and will enthusiastically accept such initiatives. Inviting them to a stand-up comedy may be a good date idea.

If you really want to impress them, plan an adventure with them. Invite them for a treasure hunt game in the open, skydiving, or similar high-adrenalin activities that will make them jump for joy!

Nevertheless, bear in mind that flirty Sevens aren’t nearly as hard to seduce as they are to keep, so make sure you really share their hunger for new experiences. Otherwise, it will be very hard for you to keep up with them.

Enneagram 8: Challenge the Challenger

Eights are tough cookies in every sense, and seducing them is a challenge, indeed! Moreover, they are usually the ones doing the seduction, and the mere idea of being seduced doesn’t appeal to them—they want to be in control at all times!

Nevertheless, with the right approach, even Eights can be seduced. First of all, you need to be very self-assured and confident, as Eights have a very low tolerance for cowardice. You’ll also need to show off your sex appeal, as Eights are very physically oriented regardless of their instinctual variant.

So, you need to be provocative and confident. For instance, inviting them to some kind of friendly competition can be a great way to spark the flame between the two of you. A billiard match in a cool bar coupled with quality liquor is a perfect setting for the passionate Eights.

Similarly to Sevens, Eights also love adventures. So, if you’re into extreme sports, you can never be wrong by inviting an Eight to join you. Just never fake being good at something, as Eights can’t stand dishonesty and weakness.

Enneagram 9: Create Art Together!

Nines enjoy making others happy but often forget what makes them happy. They seek warmth, affection, understanding, and harmony in relationships. However, due to their easygoing nature and adaptability, they get along easily with all kinds of people and may end up in relationships in which they don’t actually feel good.

Bearing this in mind, the most important thing about Nines is to avoid pressuring them into anything. It may feel irritating to wait for them to decide what they like, but it is essential to give them time and space to understand what they need.

So, the best way to win their heart is to plan a casual date, possibly a stay-at-home evening, a movie night, or a home-cooked dinner. A peaceful, homey setting allows them to relax and feel accepted. Be gently playful yet emotionally present and open, and you will see the side of Nines that they rarely show to others.

Another way to woo Nines is to invite them to some kind of art event or workshop. Appealing to their creativity is an excellent way to build a connection with them.

What Enneagram Type is Your Perfect Pair?

Take our free Enneagram test and find out now! Enneagram can help you recognize the personality types you’re most compatible with, improve your communication style, elevate your relationships, boost your confidence, and live up to your full potential.

Key Takeaways

Now that you know how to seduce each Enneagram type, you can create a detailed strategy to win the heart of your potential partner! But, before you invest all your energy into impressing the other person, ensure you understand your own romantic needs well.

With that in mind, explore your personality type thoroughly to understand the typical challenges you might face in relationships and learn about Enneagram compatibility.

Focusing on how to attract Enneagram types before learning what attracts you and why, doesn’t promise fulfilling outcomes.

So, we encourage you to explore Enneagram compatibility and Enneagram sexuality traits to gain a deeper understanding of both yourself and other Enneagram types. This will make it easier for you not only to seduce but also to attract the right people into your life.

How to Seduce Each Enneagram Type FAQ